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About Deviant Nick, The GirlFemale/United States Group :iconthewriterinus: TheWriterInUs
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Deviant for 6 Years
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Journal History

  • Listening to: NJ's nightingale
You know those days where you think to yourself "today is going to be a good day", but then it turns out to be really bad because of one thing? That's today. I recently read something someone put up recently about me and I don't get why he won't understand that it was never his fault. I feel guilty everytime I hear about how he feels guilty. Does that even make sense? I told him my reasons for doing what I did, there were family problems and I was dealing with some serious mental stress,  but it was never his fault. Later on I will admit my feelings slightly shattered when I heard of the things he had done, but what he doesn't understand is what I did to myself in hopes to throw away my pain. I used to live by the phrase "better to feel pain than nothing at all", but only after this did I realize how stupid that phrase was. I would find pain in anyway I could to try and leave the gap that was in my soul from an unknown lack of emotion. I never figured out why my emotions left me, I was just so numb from more family deaths and problems with the people I'm supposed to call my parents. Now I'm ranting. I just wish he'd stop feeling so guilty about everything, and as much as it might hurt him if he ever reads this, I'm done with that boat. The ship has sailed and I don't want it to come back. I would love to be friends, and I would love to be able to confide in you, but really I have nothing to confide. The only thing I can think of that you don't know is the swelling in my heart for another and while I can see you know now, why would I bring that up and rub salt in your obviously still oozing wound? Indirect response or not, you need to understand that before we can be friends like we used to you need to BELEIVE ME when I say it wasn't you. Until then, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I can't give you what you want. You will always have a special place in my heart, but I can't stand seeing you feel guilty over nothing.. Call me selfish, call me cruel, I don't care.

Nobody reads these anyways, so it doesn't matter if I say anything to you Reader, does it?


Nick, The Girl
United States
Hello to all. I am Shikiyo-Tenshi or as known on Fanfiction Luxord's Xigbar.

Not much to say, besides that I love art. If I think of stuff to add to this I will.


Colour: Black, Red, Green, and Purple

Book: Harry Potter series, Vampire Acadamy series, House of Night series, and others

Manga/Anime: Bleach, Naruto, Full Metal Alchemist, Death Note, Soul Eater, Vampire Night, and others

Any Questions? Call 772-283-STALKER!
Or you could just message me.........

Favourite genre of music: Alternative or Metal
Favourite style of art: Photorealism
Personal Quote: Look beyond that 1st layer, often their true identity is hidden, waiting for someone to look.

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jadelizabeth Featured By Owner May 12, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Hi. Nice to meet you, and thank you so much for your support. Hope you'll enjoy my work in the future :)
FreckledAndFearless Featured By Owner May 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks so very much for the watch! :hug: It means a lot! :aww:
kamuiatmyrealm Featured By Owner May 9, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks again for the :iconfav3dplz:.
Do check the :new: releases. :woohoo:
ASinglePetal Featured By Owner May 8, 2013  Professional Digital Artist
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Please don’t forget to comment, I love feedback and how to improve my art!

Pony commissions are open!
montag451 Featured By Owner May 7, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks a bunch for faving once again!:-)
Splice-The-HedgeFox Featured By Owner May 7, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
THANK YOU FOR THE :iconfav3dplz:
TLL-MatheX Featured By Owner May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for the Fav. on "looking up" [link] ^_^
marrciano Featured By Owner May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for faving my works ... your support is important to me ... :)
Schpeglar Featured By Owner May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Ninjameerschwein Featured By Owner May 5, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
thanks again for the fav :D
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